Here I am, finally. Hello. Long time no write, and Ill tell you why.
Today is officially three entire weeks without caffeine.Three whole fucking weeks.
The first ten days were torturous- I felt like I was hung over, had the flu, and ALSO a solid migraine. Drugged up so I could work and I slept while I wasnt working. You know what I didnt do? Anything else. I attempted a yoga practice every morning and did what I could. I did not attempt any time at the gym- which is a part of my routine. I was not productive outside of teaching classes and running my studio, which took every ounce of my energy. I did not move as much as I am used to moving. I did not write. I could barely keep my eyes open to read. Sitting down with a book meant me falling asleep within three minutes of cracking the cover. And the sleep! Lord. Hours. No little sweet kitten naps, nope, big deep bear slumbers. Id wake up feeling like I just came out of surgery, like I was pulling out of anesthesia. Ten whole days of that. Of barely feeling alive. I am past the worst parts, I feel that. Im still sleepy, the fatigue present, but Im off pain pills. My sleep doesnt make me feel like Im coming out of a car accident. Dare I say, I feel better. My migraines are gone, I feel less anxious. I can say that caffeine might not be something that ever exists again in my life. I dont think it will. I am on the other side and hell if I ever want to go back the way I came. Hard pass on that.